nothing...

I've spent the last three work days doing things for other people. All my work is piling up.

I have nothing left and it is only Wednesday night.

Tomorrow I have maybe 2 hours to myself. That is a wee bit stressful.

Mindful.

I'm sitting in the car outside a random house waiting for my daughter to finish a music lesson. There is something coming up so she had hire an accompanist to help her practice. This is in addition to her usual lessons. 

Lots of waiting as a parent. Lots.

Work has been stressful. Most of my week has been helping other people. Then I go home and try to get some work done, all the other stuff I needed to do that day but could not.

And dealing with a little smugness with a sprinkle of rudeness. That is hard to take some days.

A year or so ago I started looking into the big idea of mindfulness. One strategy that I learned about was listening to sounds. Try to just concentrate on just one sound, nothing else. Just that one. Then add in a second, consciously hold both sounds simultaneously. 

Hold two sounds is really hard.

After doing that for a while everything just relaxes.

Sitting in the car now with the windows down a bit. Just holding two or three bird songs in my head. Some days it is really hard but it always helps clear my mind.

Saw this on the stairs today.

I had just wrapped up teaching some 5th graders about germs and how they spread. I was walking (kinda running) down the hall to another classroom to help with a skype issue when I saw this. 

I love this idea and fully believe in it. It is like karma, just put that kindness out there. The world does not always return it to you but that kindness will land on the person who needs it.

This idea opened me up today. This message set on a better path.

I'm sure after a while it becomes invisible to some but not me, not today.

So what is your kindness that you will set free into the world?

Love/Hate Relationship

I have tried almost everything to get it to work. Consulted people and the web. Dumped money, time and effort but the results have yielded nothing.

I am about to give up on it. Totally start over.

Today I decided to give it one last try.

If my lawn does not start turning around this year I am starting over from scratch. Ripping it out and just buying sod. Well... paying someone else to do it for me. I am starting to realize that I am not a lawn guy.

I have a magical book.

A friend of mine lent me a book the other day. She said it would only take me like a night or less to read it. So far four nights later and I'm only on page 166.

Why is this book so magical?

It never fails. I pick it up and someone starts talking to me.

Last night while the kids were at karate I was so sure I could finish the book. I'm pretty much a quiet guy, sticks to himself and doesn't say much. Two parents talked with me the whole hour. I'm not sure that ever happened before.

The family was out today. I decided to get a bit of reading in, two words later they come back home!

I am hopeful I can finish this thing tonight!

By the way I think I am the last person on earth, or maybe just this house, who has never read about the one and only Ivan.

Jar of Awesome

We all experience great things every day. I always think I will remember them forever but I forget most of the greatness I experience. I am human and I forget.

I read about the Jar of Awesome. The idea is to write down your awesome experiences on a little note and drop it into the jar.

When you have a bad day or just out of gas, reach into the jar and relive the greatness.

Here are two things I put into my jar today. Memories I never want to forget.

I put a request out on facebook for advice on how to care for a slug as I know nothing about caring for such a delicate pet. Got some really great advice from Joe the Genius. I was able to relay information to a very grateful student. We then talked about the possibility of the Wolly Monmouth being brought back to life through a little DNA science. Our concern is figuring out where it could live so it would be protected and could be studied. Maybe an island near Russia?

I was able to talk to my brother for a bit today. Every conversation I have had with him always leaves me in a better place, never fails. We talked and laughed about our adventures from years ago. Recalling those long lost days always brings us to tears, laughing so hard my stomach still hurts. Funny how some bonds are foraged and how they are unbreakable. I am always sad when we hang up and so thankful for one more chat.

Both of these notes helped put me on the right side of gratitude.

Thought I would post a great picture of my brother. Crow on the left and I'm on the right, fast asleep. This was after spending a week or so in the jungle. Okinawa 1992.

Being a parent means you will be waiting a lot.

Last night I sat outside while Sam had her private music lesson. It can be a long thirty minutes in the car.

Tomorrow we take Aidan to a drum lesson. For those thirty minutes I sit in front of a little stage. Four random kids practice week after week the same 21 Pilots song, over and over again.

Friday night from 8-9 and Saturday from 1-2 I sit in the karate studio while the kids practice. Those are some smelly hours.

Those are just some of the times I just sit and wait.

I also think of the hundreds of dollars that we pay for this privilege. I really mean that. When I wrote the check for Sam's lessons I smiled. I felt proud that I am able to do this for her.

When I was young I dreamed of playing sports, any sport. I so wished I could take music lessons of any kind but none of this was in the cards. Some days it was luck that we had money to buy milk for breakfast.

Sometimes life is fulled of these choices. We could either be annoyed or proud, mad or happy. While it isn't easy I try to look for tiny little diamond among the coal.